I'm so sick and tired of being told to drop everything every time Netflix comes out with a new goddamn show

"No, I don't thank you for the fish at all" (notindetroit) 09/02/2016 at 11:35 • Filed to: None

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Confession time: I don’t have Netflix (yes I know combined with the fact that I still have basic cable that’s actually legally being paid for I fail as a Millennial). This means obviously I can’t watch Netflix shows. Which means even if I did get what the big deal is I’m kind of left out. But seriously someone please explain to me why it’s big news every time Netflix comes out with a new series that we have to treat it like the end-product of Community and Arrested Development having some dirty sexy fun time (BTW those are also two other shows I don’t really much care for and think are overhyped).

Now, I’m a big science fiction nerd, and I think JJ Abrams’ best movie so far is Super 8, so I can get that I’m sorely missing out on Stranger Things ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ) and that show’s actually pretty high on the list. But every thing else is...meh? Take the mockumentary posted above that Gizmodo/iO9 (or what passes for it) featured recently. Mockumentaries...with few exceptions, tend to be far more clever than they think and it’s getting close to the point where I’m starting to think the entire genre is a bane on Millennial-focused and overly-beloved entertainment. The Office (both of ‘em) was ok. Parks and Rec ...is no Office (there I said it). Modern Family ...is way past its due and is only renewed every year because ABC knows without it their entire Wednesday night lineup would collapse and with it almost their entire sitcom output (and the show suffers immensely for it).I also think a big part of a mockumentary’s success is how much a viewer can actually bother to relate to it (hence Office and early ModFam ’s success) and mascoting...well I guess it’s a good thing Netflix can flexibly appeal to a niche audience. But that only brings up another thing - why should we feel obligated to cheer on a show with non-universal, niche appeal?

This is why I stopped reading Morning Spoilers and after a while iO9 entirely, because after a while it just became endless discussion of comic books and heroes that were treated as universal knowledge that I hadn’t either heard of nor cared for. Oh, and on that subject, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! (including the Netflix exclusives). For that matter I stopped watching Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. about halfway through its second season and completely ignored all the claims of but it’s good now! because everytime I go back to it...yeah, not really.

Oh, and this was also a Netflix exclusive (and produced by the television arm of Steven Freakin’ Spielberg’s studio no less):

So, yeah, someone explain to me why Netflix is treated like Network God over all the other networks.

Also I’m greatful Jacob Hope Chapman exists, if he was still a woman I’d gladly have his babies and of course I respect his gender/sex choice. Yes he’s transgender, given Oppo’s own transgender population I doubt that’s a problem. But I’m just so glad someone else thinks the Marvel Cinematic Universe is so deeply overrated.

S65 > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:39

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What kind of filthy clod wanted another “Richie Rich”?

For Sweden > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:39

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Leave Your Spouse to Have Enough Time to Watch This New Netflix Series

Give Yourself HIV So You Have Enough Sick Leave to Watch This New Netflix Series

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:40

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I have Netflix. The only thing I’ve watched in the last 30 days has been APEX.

Ash78, voting early and often > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:41

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The best show you need to watch on Netflix is The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Everything else, from Stranger Things to House of Cards (or for Amazon, The Man in the High Castle), has left me feeling a little "meh" by the end. Now let me run away from this thread before I'm stoned to death. The shows are at least as good as most traditional network shows, they just get undue attention online because we can all time-shift and binge-watch them at will, so everyone can join in the conversation.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Ash78, voting early and often 09/02/2016 at 11:44

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Lillehammer was ok in the beginning but then got kinda stoopid.

Rainbow > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:47

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Honestly, Stranger Things is well worth it if someone is willing to give you their password. It’s only 8 50-minute episodes so far, so you can knock it out in a week, even if you have very limited free time.

I just finished it yesterday, and Eleven is one of the most lovable characters of anything I’ve ever seen, read, or played. I’m not kidding; they did a hell of a good job on her.

Also, at least a third of the show takes place in an abandoned building in Atlanta, which I’ve been inside. I’m sure you don’t care about that, but when you see the tunnels with flickering lights, the hallways with brown walls, and the exterior shots of the lab, you can be like, whoa, Rainbow was there that one time.

bob and john > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:49

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meh. netflix.

Dru > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:49

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Netflix has been a worthwhile investment for me. Though I also have digital cable so I guess I watch too much TV. I think Narcos has been my favorite thing so far. I am pretty sure I saw DVD's of it at Target recently, so that's an option.

HammerheadFistpunch > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:50

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Sorry but you don’t get to knock Christopher Guest Movies...they are magic.

LongbowMkII > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:50

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As a general rule, Netflix series are excellent for the first two seasons. Then they crash hard.

Pickup_man > Ash78, voting early and often 09/02/2016 at 11:51

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I made it through two, maybe three episodes of Kimmy before I gave up. I love Ellie Kemper, but I just couldn’t get into the show. Does it get better? Maybe I’ll have to pick it up again.

Noah - Now with more boost. > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:52

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THANK YOU. I’m right there with you. This is my biggest pet peeve with my generation. People are so out of touch with what really gets them going, that watching a copious amount of TV / movies is a hobby now. I HATE that everyone assumes that all of these actors, references, etc. are common knowledge. I hate that I’m constantly judged for not watching tv or movies.

People seem shocked, and sometimes even offended, when I admit that no, I don’t know what they’re talking about. WHAT? Watching soap operas - lets call them what they are - does not make anyone a more interesting or well rounded person. How someone could be judgemental of people who don’t is something I’ll never understand. Of course, these people then spend the next twenty minutes talking my ear off about something I’ve never seen, and telling me I should watch it. And of course, they have no interest in hearing about my hobbies - the best I get is “well... what DO you do instead!? as though reading history books and painting in the evening is just the most taboo, outlandish thing ever. UGH.

It’s really sad that having unique passions and well developed interests is a rare thing these days. For some people it’s just too easy to sink into the couch and turn your mind off. This is one of those things I’m comfortable being blatantly smug about. Not to these people’s faces of course. But yeah I absolutely feel superior here... I think this is a double edged sword though. It makes it easy for us interesting people to find each other.

Ash78, voting early and often > Pickup_man 09/02/2016 at 11:55

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Yeah, the first couple episodes (IIRC) were okay, but as it went on, it got a lot better as the characters developed. I'm not quite done with Season 2 yet, but it's still strong.

Future next gen S2000 owner > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 11:55

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I have Amazon Prime and someone elses HBO Go password to catch up on GoT.

I’m not going back to cable. I’m also not paying for Netflix.

Xyl0c41n3 > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 12:03

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So just continue not watching the shows and ignore the marketing and advertising. It’s not that hard.

Back whenever Game of Thrones was just a rumor, I was all excited because I’d read all of George R.R. Martin’s books (up until that point). Then the first season finally came out, and HBO held one of those free weekends so people could watch the first episode. That’s the only episode I’ve seen. I don’t have HBO, and I don’t really have the time to watch, anyway. I don’t even have basic cable anymore.

Do I sometimes wish I could catch up on it? Sure. But it’s not occupying the forefront of my thoughts. Nor do I really care about the hype.

Didn’t care about the hype over Breaking Bad or Mad Men or any other number of shows that are aggressively advertised. No one is forcing me to watch them. No one is forcing you. No one is telling you your taste sucks just because you don’t want to watch a show. (If they are telling you that, then drop those people).

None of this shit is “big news” if you don’t give it the attention advertisers, network promotions specialists and entertainment journalists and/or bloggers hope you do.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 12:03

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I wouldn’t consider things like The Office to be a mockumentary. Mockumentaries to me are things like Christopher Guest movies, ...And God Spoke, and (as much as I hate them) Sacha Baron Cohen movies.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Ash78, voting early and often 09/02/2016 at 12:04

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Narcos is pretty good, but I still feel like it would be better without the Americans.

shop-teacher > Pickup_man 09/02/2016 at 12:06

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It get’s much better. Give it another shot.

Ash78, voting early and often > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/02/2016 at 12:08

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Good call, I really enjoyed it. As far as I'm concerned, Wagner Moura gave an Oscar-level performance as Escobar.

Viggen > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 12:10

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The only Netflix series I’ve had any interest in has been Narcos, and that’s thanks to me being a massive history buff. Otherwise Netflix is to watch movies or TV shows I enjoy and watched in the past. Everyone freaking out about all the new Netflix originals right now is going to completely bypass the fact that a legendary classic like Jaws was released on Netflix yesterday.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Ash78, voting early and often 09/02/2016 at 12:13

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That’s the way I felt about it. He was just amazing to watch in that. The only thing I don’t like is that the American part of the story feels tacked on and like they only added it to get more Americans who would be upset about constant subtitles watching, though the scene at the beginning in Miami seemed to me like the best example of what Florida cops are really like.

shop-teacher > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 12:16

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I have Netflix, but I’m not into most of the shows people won’t shut up about. I think the reason Netflix get’s so much love, is it’s kind of like picking cable channels a-la-cart. You get access to a LOT of stuff for $9/month (or whatever it is). I cut the cable at the first of the year. I kind of miss it, but not nearly enough to start paying that big-ass bill every month again.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Xyl0c41n3 09/02/2016 at 12:16

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Breaking Bad is one of the most overrated shows I’ve ever seen.

Ash78, voting early and often > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/02/2016 at 12:16

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Yeah, totally agree. I honestly think the Americans were there primarily to establish a narrator and cut down on excessive filming in turn. It was like weak comic relief at times, or a really forced "cop buddy movie" subplot that didn't need to be there. You've gotta have an antagonist, though.

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > Noah - Now with more boost. 09/02/2016 at 12:21

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I don’t care at all for game of thrones or man in the high castle (nazi propaganda wet dream, sorry Phillip K Dick). Everything else I like. Go ahead sue me.

Hot Takes Salesman > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 12:50

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Yes, but Christopher Guest is why we should be excited for this one, not Netflix. Fuck, he could've made it for Hulu and I'd want to see it.

Xyl0c41n3 > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/02/2016 at 12:51

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#Truth.

I’ve seen most of the first season, and sporadic episodes from other seasons, and I just couldn’t get into it.

I mean, there are shows I really get into, but it’s never been because other people have told me I should be into them.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Xyl0c41n3 09/02/2016 at 12:56

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I watched the whole thing hoping for some sort of major twist or something, but there wasn’t one. It was a smug show that was too caught up in its own self importance and seemed to appeal primarily to the I Fucking Love Science crowd.

Xyl0c41n3 > Ash78, voting early and often 09/02/2016 at 12:59

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I really loved season 1 of House of Cards. Then season 2 was just so over-the-top ridiculous that it was really hard to keep up the willful suspension of disbelief. Season 3 started getting back on track a little, and season 4 was a lot more plausible.

I really enjoyed seeing Claire grow as a conniving, cold-hearted plan-maker just like her husband. It reminded me of the first season where she totally ruined the life of that woman (Gillian) whom she hired to work for her charitable organization and then fired and blackmailed. She was so calculating and unapologetic!

Then, adding in the scenes with Claire’s mother throughout Season 4... it was a really good return of suspense through drama versus suspense through highly unlikely scenarios.

Xyl0c41n3 > For Sweden 09/02/2016 at 13:07

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The disease du jour is Zika virus. Do try to keep up, FS.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Viggen 09/02/2016 at 14:08

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Narcos is good, but suffers from some idiot at the production office being convinced that it needed some American buddy-cops to get people watching. Wagner Moura is amazing in it and when it’s focusing on him and the politics of South America it’s fantastic.

derf > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 09/02/2016 at 14:33

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Mockumentaries...with few exceptions, tend to be far more clever than they think

I’m guessing you meant that the other way ‘round?